1. I have long accepted that after watching Kenneth Branagh as Iago, nothing else was ever going to come even remotely close to the flawless brilliance of his performance. So I wasn’t expecting to be blown away when I went to watch Othello at Shakespeare in the Park tonight - but I wasn’t expecting to be quite so underwhelmed either. Most of the characters - Othello, Iago, Emilia - did a pretty decent job, given the constraints of an outdoor play setting. I felt like Othello unnecessarily hammed up his grief and despair to the point that it was no longer sympathetic at all - but maybe that was necessary given the huge venue and the need to capture the attention of audience members sitting very far away. Iago was also very… shouty and brash, which was miles apart from the quiet, seething evil that I’ve always felt he was. But again - perhaps a huge venue like Fort Canning Green doesn’t lend itself very well to quiet, subtle dialogue captured through close up scenes. There was still something to appreciate about their performance, and while I didn’t love their performances, they definitely deserve the benefit of the doubt. But the two things I really cannot wrap my head around, nor find any saving grace for, are the character of Desdemona, and the total whackjob they did with the time period. Just… What. Look. I get that SRT likes to do modern twists on Shakespearean plays. But firstly, what the heck was the time period selected in this play? You have women looking like WW2 service women manning radios in one scene, and fancy war helicopters, night vision goggles and Audis in others. Their dress uniforms look like they’re from the 1949s, but their combat fatigues look like the present day military uniform. It was all a really messy, careless combination of disorienting, bland and confusing elements. This identity crisis about the time period inevitably set the tone for a really, really all over the place Desdemona. Good god, Desdemona. Her character is supposed to be quintessentially sweet, pure, shy, young and almost hyperfeminised, juxtaposed against the hypermasculine military prowess of Othello. Instead, we have a Desdemona that is, for the most part, decked out like she is going to go hunt game for Othello’s dinner, or buy him some from McDonald’s (all the costumes felt super-off actually), shouts back at him in arguments and makes out with him, butt-smacking and all, in front of his fellow soldiers. Even putting aside the actress’ grating voice and one dimensional portrayal, my fundamental problem was that that’s not who Desdemona is, at all. This kind of portrayal makes no sense later on when she falls to her knees repeatedly, and exonerates Othello with her dying breath. There is no way you can make a character like Desdemona liberated and kickass but still have her meet the end she does. Just go with what makes more logical sense! For a character that is so so crucial to the story, the fact that the character’s portrayal didn’t sit well at all with me really affected how much I enjoyed the play. Nevertheless - the actual experience of going to a park, laying out a picnic mat, having too much wine and junk food, and watching a Shakespeare play on a Friday evening was really great, I’m grateful such things exist in Singapore, and even if the actual substance of the event left a lot to be desired, the event itself was well organized. I’m sure the substance will get there eventually, and can’t wait for when it does!

    I have long accepted that after watching Kenneth Branagh as Iago, nothing else was ever going to come even remotely close to the flawless brilliance of his performance. So I wasn’t expecting to be blown away when I went to watch Othello at Shakespeare in the Park tonight - but I wasn’t expecting to be quite so underwhelmed either.

    Most of the characters - Othello, Iago, Emilia - did a pretty decent job, given the constraints of an outdoor play setting. I felt like Othello unnecessarily hammed up his grief and despair to the point that it was no longer sympathetic at all - but maybe that was necessary given the huge venue and the need to capture the attention of audience members sitting very far away. Iago was also very… shouty and brash, which was miles apart from the quiet, seething evil that I’ve always felt he was. But again - perhaps a huge venue like Fort Canning Green doesn’t lend itself very well to quiet, subtle dialogue captured through close up scenes. There was still something to appreciate about their performance, and while I didn’t love their performances, they definitely deserve the benefit of the doubt.
    But the two things I really cannot wrap my head around, nor find any saving grace for, are the character of Desdemona, and the total whackjob they did with the time period. Just… What.
    Look. I get that SRT likes to do modern twists on Shakespearean plays. But firstly, what the heck was the time period selected in this play? You have women looking like WW2 service women manning radios in one scene, and fancy war helicopters, night vision goggles and Audis in others. Their dress uniforms look like they’re from the 1949s, but their combat fatigues look like the present day military uniform. It was all a really messy, careless combination of disorienting, bland and confusing elements. This identity crisis about the time period inevitably set the tone for a really, really all over the place Desdemona.
    Good god, Desdemona. Her character is supposed to be quintessentially sweet, pure, shy, young and almost hyperfeminised, juxtaposed against the hypermasculine military prowess of Othello. Instead, we have a Desdemona that is, for the most part, decked out like she is going to go hunt game for Othello’s dinner, or buy him some from McDonald’s (all the costumes felt super-off actually), shouts back at him in arguments and makes out with him, butt-smacking and all, in front of his fellow soldiers. Even putting aside the actress’ grating voice and one dimensional portrayal, my fundamental problem was that that’s not who Desdemona is, at all. This kind of portrayal makes no sense later on when she falls to her knees repeatedly, and exonerates Othello with her dying breath. There is no way you can make a character like Desdemona liberated and kickass but still have her meet the end she does. Just go with what makes more logical sense! For a character that is so so crucial to the story, the fact that the character’s portrayal didn’t sit well at all with me really affected how much I enjoyed the play.
    Nevertheless - the actual experience of going to a park, laying out a picnic mat, having too much wine and junk food, and watching a Shakespeare play on a Friday evening was really great, I’m grateful such things exist in Singapore, and even if the actual substance of the event left a lot to be desired, the event itself was well organized. I’m sure the substance will get there eventually, and can’t wait for when it does!
    May 11, 2013

  2. Fisheye photos from Bangkok, November 2012

    (Source: Flickr / raspberrydolly)

    April 20, 2013
  3. So I spent my evening making this. It’s clichéd, and the purple paint streak down the page annoys me, and I wish the tree didn’t get cut off at the edges, but overall I quite like how it turned out. I lost patience with the little branches towards the end, too. But despite all that, I feel that it’s the least ugly of all the paintings I’ve attempted so far, so yay!  I had a lot of fun doing it, especially the paint splattering part. I’ve been trying slightly more complicated things like human figures and landscapes (and god forbid, human faces) as well, but they look nowhere near presentable yet. Hopefully I’ll get better at that stuff soon, too! ^_^;
    High Res

    So I spent my evening making this.

    It’s clichéd, and the purple paint streak down the page annoys me, and I wish the tree didn’t get cut off at the edges, but overall I quite like how it turned out. I lost patience with the little branches towards the end, too.

    But despite all that, I feel that it’s the least ugly of all the paintings I’ve attempted so far, so yay!  I had a lot of fun doing it, especially the paint splattering part. I’ve been trying slightly more complicated things like human figures and landscapes (and god forbid, human faces) as well, but they look nowhere near presentable yet. Hopefully I’ll get better at that stuff soon, too! ^_^;

    March 24, 2013
  4. Vegetable Seller23 March 2013
    High Res

    Vegetable Seller

    23 March 2013
    March 23, 2013
  5. It is this technical complexity — not laziness! — that keeps guys from doing the household laundry. We worry that if we get just one variable wrong, we will find ourselves facing a wrathful spouse, who is holding up a garment that was once a valued brassiere of normal dimensions, but is now suitable only as a sun hat for a small, two-headed squirrel.

    Dave Barry’s Laundry Tips for Guys

    Haha, old but gold! So glad Dave Barry still does the occasional columns and is still active on Twitter!! Laughed out loud at this.

    March 5, 2013

  6. 005 - Create

    The realization that so many things that enrich and enlighten my life - music that makes my heart sing, unforgettably beautiful art; novels that take me away from my life, and films that make my insides tingle – come from nothing, is amazing.

    Blank canvases, scoresheets and empty word processor screens – people lovingly fill these with with fragile, magical layers of inspiration, talent and sheer hard work.

    When I realise I’ve got the exact same nothing as my favourite authors, bands, and artists, there’s no excuse left between me and the things I aspire to create anymore.

    Go, do.

    March 3, 2013

  7. Song of the Lioness series by Tamora Pierce - tweenage book loves revisited

    image

    I was talking to a friend’s girlfriend over the weekend, and somehow the topic of her twin brother came up - everyone called me stupid when I asked if they looked alike, but when I defensively cited that I’d read a series of books as a kid where the boy and girl looked alike to the point that they were completely able to switch lives, I was surprised that she had read and was also a fan about the series I was talking about! 

    Discussing this much-beloved series - Song of the Lioness by Tamora Pierce - inspired me to re-read all the books. I’m quite impressed that almost 15 years after I first read them, I still find the books as fascinating and thrilling as ever. 

    The series follows the life and adventures of Alanna of Trebond, a young girl from a noble family who hates all things girly, and wants to be a knight. It begins with a pact between Alanna and her twin brother Thom to swap places, so that Alanna can go to the palace disguised as a boy, to undergo training to be a knight, while Thom goes off to learn how to be a sorcerer. Over the span of 4 books (and 10-ish years?), Alanna goes from a small, skinny but incredibly brave little girl hiding her true identity from everyone to a brave, awesome knight who wins the respect and admiration of everyone in the realm. Of course, her many adventures include foiling plots to overthrow the throne, bringing back tokens of immeasurable value and glory for her king and realm, and fighting back against those who underestimate her, either because she’s a scrawny little thing or a girl, coming to terms with her magical powers, and gaining the companionship of a talking cat - what’s not to love here? 

    What really made me happy as I re-read the books was that even 15 years after I first read them, these books stand up fairly well to scrutiny from a gender, class and racial perspective. Considering that all the books were written in the late ’80s, it’s pretty great that they’re so progressive and feminist (for the most part). 

    I loved the books a lot as a kid, but Alanna was never my role model in any real sense. However, upon re-reading, I do think she’s a pretty badass role model for children. She’s super brave, she has integrity, she’s selfless, sensible and strong - but yet, very believable. Her quick and fiery temper is quite endearing and often the source of comic relief, while the process of her balancing her true gender identity with her longing for adventure and great deeds is portrayed with sensitivity and empathy. 

    Her romantic relationships are also (for the time of publishing, I feel) really unconventional and liberal (reading them as an adult, there’s SO MUCH more sexual tension that I picked up on as a kid, heeee)!

    I love the fact that she’s confused between the Prince and the King of Thieves (and for a while, a third love interest), and somehow involved with them all at the same time, and that’s totally okay. She’s determined to think things through before agreeing to a marriage proposal, and while that results in a huge fight, she stands her ground and doesn’t let anything pressure her into marriage - and as a result, she eventually makes the best choice for herself, the man in question, and the realm. She breaks up with another love interest, but they’re able to remain loyal, steadfast friends with no bullshit and no drama. I think this is a tall order for pretty much ANY Young Adult fiction out there today. 

    To be fair, I did find it a bit problematic that in the earlier books, some of the men in Alanna’s life do the whole “grab and kiss” thing when she totally isn’t expecting it thing, and she does indulge in a bit of the “I’m still single” self pity thing near the end of the books. Overall, though, this is outweighed by her approach to the relationships once she is in them, and the ultimate takeaway for young readers is still quite a positive one.

    In general, Alanna’s approach to everything is very likeable - she takes her role as her prince’s squire (and later, her King’s Champion) very seriously, and is responsible, intelligent, courageous, and honourable. She has warm, loving, functional relationships with characters from a variety of class (everyone from the King of Thieves to nomadic tribes to royalty) and ethnic backgrounds (she even gets adopted by a faraway desert tribe and becomes their shaman), and enjoys the same camaraderie with her friends from the palace before and after they find out she’s a girl. She slowly develops an interest in “girly” things like dresses, trinkets and preening, but when she’s in Knight mode, she’s still totally no-nonsense and formidable. 

    She doesn’t back down from confrontation, or even feuds where the odds are stacked sky high against her, with her enemies. Her acid wit, her volatile temper and her fierce protectiveness to those she loves and has a duty to make for some pretty great encounters. Topped off with the fact that she’s pretty much a totally kickass warrior with near-unparalleled skills, Alanna of Trebond is a fucking cool character - I thought so when I was 12, and I think I feel that even more strongly when I’m 27. 

    Every single supporting character is seriously awesome as well - from the noblemen who are her teachers when she first arrives at her palace to her fellow students, from the crooked but lovable community of thieves and common-folk she befriends in the city to the solemn and reserved desert tribes, and even the grippingly evil enemies she makes in the form of bullies, rebels and contenders for the throne - Tamora Pierce is just brilliant at creating compelling, vivid characters.

    Almost 30 years after the books were published, there are still tons of fanfiction, fan-art and even fancasts being created about this series - how awesome is that? It’s funny that the closest popular culture comparison I can find for Alanna is a tomboyish Hermione Granger with a temper, and that Emma Watson is one of the fan favourites to play Alanna if there was ever a movie (Ian Somderhalder or Matt Bomer as Jon please!! Ewan McGregor as Liam! Okay, I’ll stop now). 

    Well, I think I’ve gone on long enough about these seriously awesome books - even though I feel like I could squee about them for another few hundred words if it weren’t so late. Part of me feels silly for going on and on about a Young Adult Fiction series when I’m almost 30, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy every single minute of revisiting these books this past week.

    I gave away my set of books (with the cover art shown above - all the other covers I’ve seen are so butt-ugly, for some reason) to my little niece a long time ago, but if you’re so inclined, you can acquire them in paperback or Kindle format on Amazon here (or by any other means you choose, which I certainly know nothing about). 

    Enjoy! And if you do read them, please let me know what you think of them! :)

    March 1, 2013
  8. Exactly four years after Ram and I started going out, against a backdrop of New Years’ fireworks exploding over the Chao Phraya river, we got engaged.  When we first started going out, I kept telling him he didn’t feel real. I guess it’s normal as far as first boyfriends go, but for months, I just couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that there was this person now. This amazing person who suddenly inhabited my world, with his geeky stories and love for metal music and quirky little idiosyncrasies, who I loved more and more with each passing phone call and each date.  The fluttery surrealism of a new relationship was quickly replaced by a year and half of long distance and all the ups and downs that come with the territory (hate you, time-space continuum!), and then almost two awesome years of being in the same country. The next year is going to be lived out across two countries again, but after having made it through 15,000 km between us and very expensive air tickets, we really shouldn’t complain about shuttling between Bangkok and Singapore.  When people ask me the standard post-engagement “Was it a surprise? Did you see it coming?” questions, I feel really happy when I say that yes, the exact moment took me by surprise because I was too busy photographing the fireworks, and I didn’t expect flowers and cake, but the rest of it was done the way that felt right to both of us. For almost a year prior, there were spreadsheets filled with issues to discuss and resolve, there was much overthinking about whether we were overthinking things, there was endless looking up of stuff on wikipedia and google (and pinterest, hee!), and we both went shopping for a ring together (both our moms think I am mad for insisting on a man-made diamond and recycled gold rather than a brand new ring, but I don’t care).  So, this is it. I said yes, and I’m marrying the first boy I held hands with, spent hours on the phone with, the first boy I kissed - with many more firsts to follow, I’m sure. Unlike four years ago, this feels far from unreal; it feels like its been a long time coming in the best possible way. Like watching the rain come in from across the sea; and as it reaches these shores, I can’t wait to see what beautiful, amazing things will bloom. 
    High Res

    Exactly four years after Ram and I started going out, against a backdrop of New Years’ fireworks exploding over the Chao Phraya river, we got engaged. 

    When we first started going out, I kept telling him he didn’t feel real. I guess it’s normal as far as first boyfriends go, but for months, I just couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that there was this person now. This amazing person who suddenly inhabited my world, with his geeky stories and love for metal music and quirky little idiosyncrasies, who I loved more and more with each passing phone call and each date. 

    The fluttery surrealism of a new relationship was quickly replaced by a year and half of long distance and all the ups and downs that come with the territory (hate you, time-space continuum!), and then almost two awesome years of being in the same country. The next year is going to be lived out across two countries again, but after having made it through 15,000 km between us and very expensive air tickets, we really shouldn’t complain about shuttling between Bangkok and Singapore. 

    When people ask me the standard post-engagement “Was it a surprise? Did you see it coming?” questions, I feel really happy when I say that yes, the exact moment took me by surprise because I was too busy photographing the fireworks, and I didn’t expect flowers and cake, but the rest of it was done the way that felt right to both of us. For almost a year prior, there were spreadsheets filled with issues to discuss and resolve, there was much overthinking about whether we were overthinking things, there was endless looking up of stuff on wikipedia and google (and pinterest, hee!), and we both went shopping for a ring together (both our moms think I am mad for insisting on a man-made diamond and recycled gold rather than a brand new ring, but I don’t care). 

    So, this is it. I said yes, and I’m marrying the first boy I held hands with, spent hours on the phone with, the first boy I kissed - with many more firsts to follow, I’m sure. Unlike four years ago, this feels far from unreal; it feels like its been a long time coming in the best possible way. Like watching the rain come in from across the sea; and as it reaches these shores, I can’t wait to see what beautiful, amazing things will bloom. 

    January 8, 2013

  9. Thank you, 2012

    I do one of these every year in one form or another, so here goes. Am rather inebriated, so contents might be more incoherent and/or sappy than displayed on packaging.


    Best of 2012:
    1. I did something this year that I had never before - took a chance on something that I really really wanted, no holds barred. I wish I could share more details about it here but I can’t. It didn’t work out in the end, because what I found beneath the surface of something very glossy was really quite disappointing, but I gave it absolutely my all and I’m glad I did, no regrets. The degree to which it did work out was quite a confidence boost as well.  :) 

    2. I got more onz about fitness this year - partly because I began to freak out at officially being closer to 30 than 20, and all the healthcare concerns that start at that age, and partly because I’ve got me a major life event happening in a year or so that I want to be in good shape for. ^_^ Fitness has been a lot of fun, to be honest. I go running with colleagues and at the park connector near my house, I have found some things to do with a stability ball and dumbbells at home,  and even managed to prance down to the gym with Ram, which is something new for us. I’m determined to be as non-militant and body positive about this as possible, but I do hope all the hours on the treadmill and all the forgone deserts show some results soon. 

    3. In case you are wondering, yes, Major Life Event thing is of the boy-related nature. Nothing is official yet, and because I am a superstitiousbutt I don’t want to say more and jinx anything, but I’m excited. And grateful for all the good things related to this, and him, and us. And excited. And just a little bit more excited on top of that. 

    4. My cousins and their very ultra cute son visited - oh my god, cutest kid ever!! I’m really glad I got to spend quality time with my cousin and her husband, they are so damn awesome it makes my head spin. Their visit reiterated to me that family doesn’t always have to be about blood - they’re not blood cousins, but very few people feel more like family than them. 

    5. My own room! We moved house in May, and for the very first time, I have my own room!! I grew up sharing a room with my sister, but both of us are absolutely love having our own space. A room of one’s own probably isn’t a big deal to most people, but if you’ve never had one before, with the exception of overseas trips by the other siblings, even small things - such as having your own desk, and the ability to stay on the phone late at night without disturbing anyone - really feel quite marvelous. 

    6. My year started on an awesome note - one of the closest friends I made while at Warwick, and never really expected to see again after that, went on an awesome, 10-day long holiday together!! It often felt like she and I hail from totally different worlds (she’s from Pakistan, and our frames of reference for a lot of things are worlds apart), but when I saw her waiting for me at the arrivals hall in Bangkok, everything just felt right. I could have asked for a better opportunity to reconnect with a dear friend, and I couldn’t be more grateful for the fact that we still get to be in each others lives despite living in two diametrically opposite worlds.

    7. I’m grateful for the friends and family I’m lucky enough to have closer to home as well. 2012 has given me many awesome conversations and bonding opportunities with my real family and my chosen family (J and K), and I’m a better person for it. I’ve learnt how to be more generous, more selfless, got new perspectives, and gained so much. What did I ever do to deserve such awesome parents and sister, friends, and the boy who I’ll be calling family soon? I don’t know, but thank you universe for these magical people, and please show me what I need to do to keep it coming. :)

    8. Fell in love with watercolour painting. Browsed endless images on tumblr, took 20 weeks of classed and made some drawings of my own. Hopefully the painting I create in 2013 will be good enough to share on tumblr. ^_^


    The not so good of 2012:

    1. The recent death of the 23-year old medical student who was brutally and horribly gang raped in Delhi is freshest in my mind as the worst news/occurrence of 2012; I don’t know how to process the fact that in this day and age, women (from the country I’m from, but anywhere in the world, really) are vulnerable to such horrific violence, which is very rarely prosecuted. The fact that its so common and often, we are so desensitized to it makes me feel ashamed and depressed, but I don’t know what to do about it. Al the blog, Facebook and Twitter posts in the world don’t feel like enough, and I need to find some way to contribute that actually makes a difference. Any suggestions are welcome. 

    2. Work has been pretty indifferent this year. There are shining moments where I feel so inspired and motivated and determined, and others where I feel so disillusioned and dejected and frustrated. It is a pretty exhausting emotional roller coaster all in all, and I’m not sure how do deal with it. But I have colleagues I get along with and thankfully subscribe to the same anti-drama, anti-politics stance as I do, so it’s definitely a lot better off that some. Hope 2013 gives me some clearer direction on this front though.

    3. I have been an epic fail at getting my driving license. More than a thousand bucks and 50 hours worth of lessons in, I haven’t gotten my act together long enough to book my practical test, finish last few lessons and get that damn card. Simply must finish this in 2013. 

    Off the top of my (very tipsy) head, this is all I can think of. Feel thankful that the good far outnumbers that bad, even if its just because my touch typing skills are taking a severe beating from the alcohol in my system. Happy New Year, you guys, I hope whatever your wishes are for the new year, they come true. 



    December 31, 2012
  10. Reblogged from fuckyouverymuch: We protest - punish rapists, not protestors! Spent my morning break catching up on the coverage surrounding the ongoing protests in Delhi about the horrible, inhumane gang rape of a 23-year old student on a bus in Delhi, and was left feeling utterly nauseated, depressed and frankly, terrified.  I am absolutely gobsmacked at the extent to which politicians will go to, to pin the blame on anything and anyone except the actual men who commit rape. So far, various Indian officials have managed to blame everything from the way women dress and the hours at which they feel they have a right to navigate public space safely, and from the hormonal imbalance caused by consuming chow mien to the fact that “it must have been consensual” to explain away rape.  Carry chilli powder to ward off attackers, they say. Don’t go out after dark, they say (and yet, the number of families in India who rely on the earnings of women remains huge). Cover up in public, they say. And all the while, the one thing that’s simply begging to be said, no, screamed at people, is: don’t. fucking. rape. That the appropriate response to seeing a woman alone or vulnerable is not to assault her. That it is shameful and disgusting to do what you do, not macho. I could go on, but it’s too depressing to.  I agree with the sentiment that right now, I feel pretty ashamed to be Indian. Ashamed that the country I come from is where atrocities like this go on, but more importantly I think, ashamed that I can’t do anything to help. When I go to Bombay, I enjoy the freedom to go out alone in the day, but I can’t even take a taxi for 20 minutes come evening. Even my sleeveless tops get left in my closet here. I often scoff that my parents and relatives are being too paranoid, and too conservative - but next time, even though I know it’s not helping change anything, I might not be so scornful after all. Bombay may not be as unsafe a city as Delhi, but I’d still be scared anyway.  The general sentiment seems to be that change will be slow, but I guess getting the prosecution rate from 25%, taking action against politicians with charge sheets against them and at least, at least, guaranteeing that women won’t be assaulted in the police stations that they seek refuge from domestic abuse/sexual violence in would be a good start. Here’s hoping and praying - for change, and that the survivor recovers and heals soon. PS: Regarding the pro death-penalty sign, though, this excerpt from the must-read commentary by Urvashi Butalia debunks the idea that death penalty will be effective in tackling the problem: First, more than 90 per cent of rapes are committed by people known to the victim/survivor, a staggering number of rapists are family members. When we demand the death penalty, do we mean therefore that we should kill large numbers of uncles, fathers, brothers, husbands, neighbours? How many of us would even report cases of rape then? What we’re seeing now — the slow, painful increase in even reports being filed — will all disappear. Second, the death penalty has never been a deterrent against anything — where, for example, is the evidence that death penalties have reduced the incidence of murders? Quite apart from the fact that the State should never be given the right to take life, there is an argument to be made that imposing the death penalty will further reduce the rate of conviction, as no judge will award it.
    High Res

    Reblogged from fuckyouverymuch: We protest - punish rapists, not protestors!

    Spent my morning break catching up on the coverage surrounding the ongoing protests in Delhi about the horrible, inhumane gang rape of a 23-year old student on a bus in Delhi, and was left feeling utterly nauseated, depressed and frankly, terrified. 

    I am absolutely gobsmacked at the extent to which politicians will go to, to pin the blame on anything and anyone except the actual men who commit rape. So far, various Indian officials have managed to blame everything from the way women dress and the hours at which they feel they have a right to navigate public space safely, and from the hormonal imbalance caused by consuming chow mien to the fact that “it must have been consensual” to explain away rape. 

    Carry chilli powder to ward off attackers, they say. Don’t go out after dark, they say (and yet, the number of families in India who rely on the earnings of women remains huge). Cover up in public, they say. And all the while, the one thing that’s simply begging to be said, no, screamed at people, is: don’t. fucking. rape. That the appropriate response to seeing a woman alone or vulnerable is not to assault her. That it is shameful and disgusting to do what you do, not macho. I could go on, but it’s too depressing to. 

    I agree with the sentiment that right now, I feel pretty ashamed to be Indian. Ashamed that the country I come from is where atrocities like this go on, but more importantly I think, ashamed that I can’t do anything to help. When I go to Bombay, I enjoy the freedom to go out alone in the day, but I can’t even take a taxi for 20 minutes come evening. Even my sleeveless tops get left in my closet here. I often scoff that my parents and relatives are being too paranoid, and too conservative - but next time, even though I know it’s not helping change anything, I might not be so scornful after all. Bombay may not be as unsafe a city as Delhi, but I’d still be scared anyway. 

    The general sentiment seems to be that change will be slow, but I guess getting the prosecution rate from 25%, taking action against politicians with charge sheets against them and at least, at least, guaranteeing that women won’t be assaulted in the police stations that they seek refuge from domestic abuse/sexual violence in would be a good start. Here’s hoping and praying - for change, and that the survivor recovers and heals soon.

    PS: Regarding the pro death-penalty sign, though, this excerpt from the must-read commentary by Urvashi Butalia debunks the idea that death penalty will be effective in tackling the problem:

    First, more than 90 per cent of rapes are committed by people known to the victim/survivor, a staggering number of rapists are family members. When we demand the death penalty, do we mean therefore that we should kill large numbers of uncles, fathers, brothers, husbands, neighbours? How many of us would even report cases of rape then? What we’re seeing now — the slow, painful increase in even reports being filed — will all disappear. Second, the death penalty has never been a deterrent against anything — where, for example, is the evidence that death penalties have reduced the incidence of murders? Quite apart from the fact that the State should never be given the right to take life, there is an argument to be made that imposing the death penalty will further reduce the rate of conviction, as no judge will award it.

    December 27, 2012